10 Ways to Become an Expert Chat Host

KikiMiller has been a Top Chat Host on Arousr for more than 6 years.  We asked her to share some expert tips.

Learn the top 10 ways to become an expert chat host from the interaction we had with an Arousr chat host, Kikimiller in this detailed interview.

1. How long would you estimate that it took you to become an Expert Sex chat host on Arousr?

KikiMiller: I’ve been doing this for a long time! About six years. This work is second nature to me now, but it was a bit difficult in the beginning. It helps that I love to write and I’d like to think of myself as creative. I got the hang of things after a few months when I first started, and I’ve learned a lot of things over time that have improved my skills.

2. What is the best way to have an engaging chat session with a member who is incredibly shy?

KikiMiller: A lot of our customers have self esteem issues or are very shy. If they’re giving you one word answers, don’t push them to contribute to the chat too hard. What I usually do is try to go a little above and beyond in the roleplays for shy members. Figure out the gist of what they want and be more descriptive in your scenarios. You’re writing for two, basically, so it feels similar to just writing a short story live. I’ve had many guys who barely talk and I’m not sure they’re into it but afterwards will tell me I was fantastic.

3. How do you find out what members really want when they themselves are unsure of what they are looking for?

KikiMiller: If someone is indecisive it generally means “nothing crazy”. Ask them if there is anything they’ve been curious about, fantasies they’ve had or porn they’ve watched that have piqued their interest in a new kink/fetish. If they still aren’t sure, I typically just go with something vanilla. Maybe add some very light BDSM themes and see how they respond.

4. When is the best time to start asking those kinky questions?

KikiMiller: I ask immediately! Most customers I talk to are ready to jump straight into dirty chatting. So one of the first things I ask is, “what are you into?”. Maybe warm up with some light flirting first, but most of our customers…they know why they’re here and what they want.

5. How do you handle unruly members when they try to break the Arousr TOS (rules) during sessions?

KikiMiller: I have a low tolerance for any rude customers. I tell them a subject is off limits or that they’re breaking site rules, and if they continue I simply report and block them. In all my years working as a chat host this happens to me so rarely that they aren’t worth entertaining at all in my opinion.

6. If someone is very inexperienced in their sexual maturity how do you keep things interesting?

KikiMiller: If they’re inexperienced, I try to give them a girlfriend experience unless they tell me something they’re specifically into. I go through a roleplay/scenario that would just describe real, normal sex. Normal sex embellished to be more perfect than real life, of course, haha.

7. What and How do you set boundaries for things you will/will not engage in when online?

KikiMiller: You will need to decide for yourself what you will and will not do with customers. I will basically do everything except for what the site explicitly doesn’t allow or is illegal. The only other thing I won’t do is let a customer insult my looks. If a customer wants to be dominant, I just tell him first my only boundary is not making fun of my looks. They’ve always been sweet about it! So I would say just be upfront, if they’re asking for something that broaches your own boundaries, let them know in a polite way, and offer up something similar you could do that you’re comfortable with.

8. How do you keep a member engaged when they want to rush through an expert chat host session?

KikiMiller: If a member is rushing through a sex chat session, they likely just want to get some photos from you and log out. I only send photos to customers who talk to me for a while first, so I will tell a customer to help turn me on, dirty talk with me, get me excited, while engaging in dirty talk myself. Put a little more into your descriptors in your dirty talk to try and get them hooked. Some guys don’t realize how hot a text message can be until you show them. I’ve definitely converted a few customers who said they never got off to texting before!

9. Where do you suggest finding inspiration to keep your sex chat host sessions erotic and unique?

KikiMiller: This sounds pretentious, but try reading more good books! The best inspiration I’ve had for writing comes from reading good writers. Another tip, maybe try writing out a short story to yourself based on what turns only you on. Get into it and see if you can excite yourself from your own writing! Try to remember how incredible it is that people can get pleasure from your words alone.

10. Why do you think members enjoy chatting with you so much on the platform?

KikiMiller: I’m friendly, creative, I typically put some work into my messages, and I’m familiar with a lot of fetishes. That last part helps me a lot, I think. If you aren’t familiar with the world of fetishes, start researching. Sissification, small penis humiliation, cuckolding, and BDSM have been some of my most popular requests for years. If someone asks you for something you haven’t heard before, tell them to explain it to you and that you love trying new things.