How to Ask Someone: Would You Like to Trade Some Pics or Sex Chat?

You don’t have to be a voyeur or an exhibitionist to want to trade pics or sex chat with someone you don’t know. Basically, all you need is a pulse. Psychologists have studied why trading nudes are so fun, and their findings suggest that people feel sexy, desired, and confident when they find a good sex chat partner. Plus, trading nudes gives your brain a boost of dopamine, and you feel an adrenaline rush. That cocktail of hormones that make you feel so good is just one of the reasons so many people love to trade nude pics and sex chat. It can be addictive—in a good way—when you get positive reinforcement about your body. And you can even learn to love parts of yourself or get over insecurities that hampered your sex life before.

The hard part is finding someone to have fun with. Asking someone if they would like to exchange nudes can seem invasive. Or feel like you’re putting yourself out there for repeated rejection. So, below is our guide to asking someone for nudes or to sex chat.

Asking the Question: How to Trade Pics?

The bad news is that there’s no getting around asking the question. You always have to ask before you trade nude pics with someone you don’t know. If you send an unsolicited dick pic, you can suffer many different repercussions that could affect your job or even be illegal, depending on where you live. Plus, it can be traumatizing to the person you sent it to. So, avoid that entirely.

Go Slow

Luckily, the conversation doesn’t have to be uncomfortable. But to ensure you can have a casual conversation that leads up to sex chat, you’ll have to bring your flirting a-game. Though you may have been ready to sex chat, like, yesterday, your partner may not. So, after you ask what they’re up to, don’t rush right into “send nudes!” The urgency might be a turnoff to the person you’re texting.

Test the Response

Try testing the waters first. Say something flirty or make a comment that has a double (preferably sexual) meaning, and see if the other person responds. Then, move slowly toward more direct flirting and complimenting them. If they change the subject or react by laughing, there’s a chance they aren’t interested. The important part is to start out slowly and create an atmosphere of sexual tension first. That will make the question of “do you want to trade nudes” more natural to ask. And it will mean your partner is more likely to respond favorably.

Rapid Action

It’s by far the easiest to ask to trade nudes if you’re already heading down the sexting path when your conversation becomes more overtly sexual. Asking for nudes out of the blue will feel more like you’re asking for a favor than interested in having a sex chat together. Spontaneity is good in general. But not when you’re asking someone to take their clothes off and send you the evidence.

Where to Find a Sex Chat Partner

Finding a sex chat partner is a bit like looking for a needle in a haystack. Luckily, the Internet has made the haystack a lot easier to sort through. So you can find your person and have virtual sex with them, no matter where they live.

Follow the Instinct

The more explicit you can be about your desires, the better. Don’t sugarcoat it, even if you’re worried other people won’t be into the same things. If you’re into really kinky stuff, say so. This will help the people who are poor matches opt-out—and those who are good matches opt-in. Countless people are in the same boat as you are—and the most popular sex chat topics may surprise you, so don’t be embarrassed by your sexual interests.

Be Honest

And, there’s no shame in not being an expert on what you like. If you’ve never tried being submissive before, don’t lie about it. Being honest will help you find someone willing to go slow and show you the ropes rather than be shocked and dismissive if you don’t know exactly what you’re doing the first time.

Join a Site

Some people make the mistake of using dating sites in order to find someone to trade nudes. But most people who join dating websites are there for one thing: dating. If you are only looking for sex, it’s typically more effective to join a site that caters specifically to that.

When you’re ready to find someone to trade pics and sex chat with, don’t use sites like Kik that don’t bother to verify how old everyone on the site is. You can get into legal trouble that way. Instead, find a sex chat site that ensures everyone is an adult, and then get as wild or kinky as you’d like.