Why Men Prefer Asian Women
The captivating allure of Asian women goes back as far as the 1200’s when Marco Polo traveled the Silk Road.
They’ve been some of the most beautiful and romantic female protagonists in some of the 20th century’s most popular musical productions, Madame Butterfly and Miss Saigon. Even a study on facial attractiveness at Cardiff University in 2012 found East Asian women scored most attractive by men.
Today’s sexual reputations of Asian women range from the dozens of niche porn video and webcam sites that focus on “hot Asian babes” to about 2,770 erotic books about Asian women on Amazon. Even several AROUSR chat hosts who engage in consensual adult sexting, phone sex and Skype sex are Asian women. They know they’re Asian, they know they’re hot, and they’re not afraid to put it out there.
This is deemed racist by some. Why?
There’s a website that ranks porn sites by niches and popularity. It says, “Asian girls are renowned for their beautiful eyes, dark silky hair, and often sexy little petite bodies.”
Okay, that’s a nice thing to say. That is until you read the next line. It goes like this, “So get your chopsticks and sushi, put up your feet and enjoy some Asian sex sites with a glass of the finest sake!”
Ugh. That’s enough to ruin an appetite for food or sex.
Then there are guys out there who believe that Asian women are passive. They view Asian women as sexual bucket list commodities and red light girls. They praise Asian women for respecting men, but confuse respect for obedience and subservience.
“Neither the assumption that all Asian women are submissive dolls who do everything that you want nor the fact that every man who is into them wants to have a submissive slave is true,” sex blogger Sebastian Harris says about why he likes Asian women in his article, Why do White Men Like Asian Women? “Those girls are human beings like every other woman and everyone who has at least a little bit of dating experience with them knows, that they also have their own opinion … When you combine all the individual physical, mental, emotional and intellectual characteristics of Asian women, you will get a full package that matches with the ideal image of 99% of men on this earth.”
As a Caucasian woman, that sounds like a compliment, but some Asian women still view comments like that as racist and misogynistic.
“(I)n an open letter to the culture minister earlier this year, actors from The British East Asian Artists (BEA) criticised the BBC and other outlets for their cultural stereotyping of East Asians on TV and stage – describing the female parts as ‘passive and submissive’,” Yuan writes.
“One of the contributing factors to this stereotype is the way the media portrays Asian women,” katmelon says. “Simultaneously, the lack of Asian female representation plays a part in this. Asian female voices are ignored, silent, passive.”
Those are great first steps in using the media in getting Asian women’s voices heard, but why not do more? If Asian porn sites fill the Internet, why not use it to portray Asian women in other ways? Tear down the myths and mystique that have been perpetrated throughout the centuries. Like the Don Draper character in Mad Men said in an episode, “If you don’t like what is being said, then change the conversation.”
Respect and loyalty are other things that a lot of men find appealing about Asian women. As a woman, those are things I love about the man in my life. At the core, those are the things that make our relationships so hot! I don’t see those traits in him being any different than what Sebastian finds appealing in Asian women.
“You usually won’t see children who throw themselves crying on the floor because they didn’t get the sweets they wanted. You won’t see women who treat their boyfriends in a disrespectful way,” Sebastian says.
“Respect is not the only thing that got lost in many relationships. Loyalty is also a word that doesn’t appear in the dictionaries of many women. Thereby, I am not even talking about sexual loyalty. I am talking about the loyalty to support each other, to be there for your partner and to not stab him in the back whenever you get the chance to do so. If you want to know what I mean, you just have to date an Asian woman and talk about your vision to start a business. She won’t tell you that you should stay realistic and stop dreaming. She will give you a kiss and tell you that she believes in you.”
If that’s Sebastian’s experience, I’ll take his word for it. And when you think of it, how is that different than the Beach Boys’ preference for California girls?
Men are always going to have a preference for certain types of women, but the differentiating factor is in how men treat women. Show respect and be kind and thoughtful. Doing and being those things are not exclusive of having a great relationship, sex or sexting or phone sex experience. If anything, those are the hallmarks of great lovers and sexters.
Are you a guy who loves Asian women? Are you an Asian woman who’s not passive or submissive? Join us in the Comments section or on Twitter at @arousr for a sex-positive discussion about busting myths and stereotypes about Asian women.